G'day

I was not sure who to talk to about this or if I should even tell anyone at all but I have decided to share a little about myself and life here with people that may understand.

I'm a 32yo single Father of a wonderful Daughter who really is the apple of my eye and it has only been her and I since just before her first birthday.

Things have been pretty tough since I was about 18yo but I finally settled down removing myself from the drug scene just after my daughter was born and even managed to save enough for a deposit on a home.

My daughter really is a great person and enjoys her school work (way more then I ever did!) she has been on the SRC for the previous four years and this year she is on the WAC proving a valuble addition to what I consider to be a friendly and worthy school.

In October of last year our home was gutted by fire after a four way power board caught fire when we were out, we came home to see three fire trucks and dozens of fireman trying to save our home but everything was lost and the worst part of it all was that the insurance policy had lapsed six weeks earlier due to tough finanical times.

I have to admit for a couple of weeks after the fire I felt rather flat and I was not sure what would happen but after spending two weeks with my elderly parents I decided I would try rebuilding the house myself with some help from my dad and even my daughter, we cleaned the house out (you would be surprised how big a job that is) of everything right down to the brick walls and floorboards.

As money allows We are slowly rebuilding even though on a pension money is very tight but we have got the framework of the house back up and the roof on so we are getting there.

Early this year I was diagnosed with type two diabetes and it lowered my spirits further, my daughter has been living with my parents since the house fire because during the rebuild I am sleeping in a single room in my backyard and I don't believe it is the right space for a tweleve year old girl to live with her father.

We see each other every day and often go fishing or to the drive-in and she even took up dancing about three years ago or so after watching video clips from people including Jennifer.

This last week I have had the Flu (normal not swine) and that on top off waiting to get some teeth taken out that are keeping my in constant pain had me at witts end, this afternoon I was sitting here sobbing wondering if life was really worth living?

For what ever reason I decided to put on a couple of music videos while I sat looking at the different pills and the knife that were within reach, I can honestly say without a doubt that today Jennifer Lopez saved my life!

Her music vidoes All I Have, I'm Real, and Control Myself played one after the other as I sat watching them through tear soaked eyes looking at Jennifer seeing how pure and down right decent she comes across as a person.

Watching Jennifer perform is a pleasure she helps me realise that life is worth living and that with love and guidence parents can help a little girl grow into a wonderful woman who can trully save lives and that is what I hope I can do for my daughter, help her grow into a wonderful woman.

Thank you Jennifer for simpley being you and for being the blessing that you are.

best wishes
Dean.